Have you lost your mind?

On the outside, nothing changes. Your heart beats your lungs breathe and – to the outside world, at least – you appear to be a normal, functioning member of society but underneath it all your mind has gone stark-raving mad.

I’m not sure why I went mad. But I sure as hell know how.

And to be honest, it shocked me. As a writer I’ve always expected a combination of scotch, explosives and handguns to do me in.

Surprisingly, it was the absence of such things which pushed me over the brink.

Here’s the funny thing, though. Going mad was – without qualification – the best thing that ever happened to me.

Image by Victor Bezrukov (Flickr)

Self-Loathing

At this point I’m already disgusted with this post. Here I’ve been, rambling on for 133 words without telling you where this whole affair went down and why it changed my life.

It happened in India.

My friend – a madman by all accounts ventured to this ill-begotten Himalayan land years before.

A genius-lunatic fueled by whiskey and unleashed on an unsuspecting public. A man who once scratched a butcher’s knife along his sleeping roommate’s door, asking him to  ”Come out and play.”

Yes, he was a madman. But after that stint in India well he found peace. He went from Lewiss Carroll to Mahatmi Gandhi seemingly overnight.

It was incredible.

And when he cited a ten-day meditation course as the reason why, I decided to find out for myself.

The Life-or-Death Struggle

I arrived in McLeod Ganj, India.

The meditation center perched high above the town itself. Here I was to spend the next ten days of my life. Ten days without speaking, sex, booze, meat, TV, notebooks, computers or (gasp!) Internet access.

Like many positive, life-changing experiences, I was afraid.

Someone once said “There is nothing to fear but fear itself.” If true, that is a terrifying statement. Because once you start fearing fear itself you plunge headfirst into a never-ending downward spiral of horror.

These were the thoughts going through my mind as I entered my new home, for ten days of meditation in complete, utter silence.

Picture yourself in prison. Solitary confinement.

Image by Victor Bezrukov (Flickr)

You start contemplating strange, mind-smashing concepts. Questions like What song would you commit suicide to? and How many ravens would it take to pull Earth from orbit? fly through your mind with reckless abandon. Time loses all meaning.

You sit there, focused on your breathing. Time passes. Your legs ache. Your back aches. Your mind wanders. You bring it back. It wanders again. You realize, slowly at first, that you’ve gone completely mad.

Then something gives. Your mind travels across space and, suddenly, the thoughts STOP. Or rather, you stop. Suddenly, it’s just you, your body and your mind. And all those crazy thoughts – every single last one of them – rush past you like a New York City subway train.

Things get quiet after that. The sensation is similar to scuba diving: you float along, focused intently on what is immediately in front of you, with nothing more than the sound of your breathing.

That’s it, really.

Craving and Aversion

The Buddha taught that all suffering stems from craving and aversion. When we crave something (e.g. more money, a new car, a guest post on Zen Habits) we place our happiness on an external object.

Same goes for aversion. When we avoid something (work, washing the car, writing that post) it places our happiness on the avoidance of an external object.

Both these emotions, according to the Buddha, cause needless suffering.

The only remedy, he explained, is to develop a natural resistance to craving and aversion through focus. You must train your mind to be aware of these stimuli, but remain strong enough to not give into them.

The Buddha’s form of meditation is called Vipassana lets you accomplish both. For hours at a time, you sit, quietly, focusing on each body part, piece by piece. You start at the tip of your head, noting each sensation, and work down to your toes.

That improves your focus. And believe me, all those aches and pains from sitting cross-legged help you develop your natural resistance to aversion. Yes, it hurts but you learn to get past that.

Craving comes later. After six days of meditation I had a breakthrough. Instead of focusing on each body part, piece by piece, I could focus on my entire body at once. It was faster, more efficient (?) and best of all it felt damn good.

This is quite common. And it’s where many practitioners get stuck. They begin to crave this state, and end up in a different form of suffering: always chasing the next high.

Meditation is not a high. It’s a method for improving for your life through awareness. Every single decision you make today may be directed by craving and/or aversion. Through meditation you train yourself to remove these limitations and, yes, find inner peace.

Image by kudumomo (Flickr)

Inner Peace

Ten days passed. On the final day we were allowed to speak. And let me tell you, those were some of the most important, thoughtful conversations I have ever had. You’d think that after ten days of silence we’d babble on about something, anything like people bursting to the surface after too much time underwater.

But we didn’t.

Because through meditation the madness had bubbled up, reached the surface of our consciousness and popped. All that remained were focused and peaceful minds. All that remained was us stripped bare of needless suffering. No cravings, no aversions. Just pure being.

Like most life-changing experiences, I was terrified. Going crazy, even for just a few days, is not my idea of a good time.

But I realized something. I realized that madness was a byproduct of filtering all the noise in my mind. Once I powered through it, there was nothing but clarity on the other side. Clarity of mind. Clarity of purpose.

And there’s nothing crazy about that.

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About the Author: Adam Costa is Editor in Chief of Trekity.com, an “insanely” useful travel site. He also runs the Travel Blogger Academy, which shows how bloggers can grow their travel blogs traffic. Follow Adam on Twitter here.

I could write about our Swami on Patnem Beach and tell you everything that I have learned.

But I find that his website that is posted on his business card gives a better story than I could ever tell.

We didn’t realize that we were taking classes from someone quite extraordinary.  He has a presence and is calm and peaceful, but until we pulled up a chair the other night and read his story, we didn’t know just what Swami Shinva Nand Jee was all about.  Our jaws dropped once we finished reading this post written by another of his students and it tells his story so beautifully, that we just had to share it with you.

Blog post from Jean Phillipe Soule of Native Planet

To read the rest of his story, click here

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We were going to wait to study Yoga in the North at an Ashram.

It was supposed to just be a drop in class when we visited Swami Shiva Nand Jee’s class on Patnem Beach.  We followed the painted fabric yoga signs to a tranquil hut behind Mountain Palms Restaurant.  Three and a half bamboo thatched walls enclose a yoga studio.  Large beach mats lay over the sand with rows of yoga mats facing centre.

Swami Shivan Nand Jee

Many people are intimidated by the photos of our instructor pasted on the walls.  His body is contorted in all directions.  Legs over his head, postures where he is shaped like a pretzel.  He’s not going to make us do that is he?
Swami Shivanand is a master of yoga.  We has won national competitions, he is a high priest and his Guru has sent him away to share is knowledge and message of peace.
Yoga is something that I have practiced on and off at home.  I always went to class for the workout though.  Bikrim (hot) Yoga has been my practice of choice.
The west has adopted and accepted yoga with open arms, but we have lost the spirituality along the way.   This is something that we are learning from Shivanand Jee.

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What we do

We are still getting a workout, our aching shoulders, backs and slimming waste lines as proof.  But now we are gaining insight into the meaning of Yoga.
Each class begins with a mantra.  The Swami’s voice resonates as he chants Om followed by a song.  I don’t know what he is saying, but he explains that it is a mantra to centre our bodies and relax our minds.
It certainly works.  Even when I haven’t felt like attending class, the minute his mantra is over, my mind is clear and I am ready to work.
It didn’t feel as if we did much during our first class, but the next day our muscles were certainly feeling the burn.
Each day we perfrom our poses in sequence and each day he adds more advance asanas (postures) increasing the difficulty.
Within one week, we are already feeling limber and calm.
We are performing shoulder stands and dropping our feet over our heads to the ground.  We can touch our toes and rest our heads almost to our knees and we can balance and pose with certain stability.
For two people that really neglected to take care of their bodies this past year, we are starting to see a semblance of our old selves again.

Western Yoga Teachers

There are other yoga studios nearby. They are all led by European and American instructors.  The are a great workout I am sure, but why would you come to India to learn from someone that you could see at home?
We are taking classes from a genuine Swami.  He talks to us about how meditation can  improve life.  He says that while Yoga is important to keep your body fit and flexible, it is really used as preparation for meditation.

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Meditation is more important than the Yoga itself.

However, without yoga making a strong and healthy body, one will not be able to truly meditate.  The stronger you are, the deeper your meditation will become.
I have a long way to go with the meditation and breathing.  My personality is prone to worry and stress which has made my breathing tense and shallow.   I have a hard time letting go and not forcing out the air.  I try too hard and think too much.
Swami is working on this with me.  He tells me to follow Dave.  Dave is doing the breathing so well and relaxed.  I must take it slow making baby steps.  Dave is already following along to perfection.
It is his laid back personality that has made him a master meditator in a short time.

Dave wasn’t keen on practicing Yoga in India.  Yoga is not exactly adventure travel after all.  But now that we have taken our classes with the Swami, he suggests that we continue with practice all the way through India.

I think that is a splendid idea.

The Famous BackPacker Ghetto of Kho San Road Bangkok

So you have been backpacking through South East Asia for a couple of months. You have travelled through several countries trekking over mountains, sleeping in dingy guest houses, wearing the same clothes for days and you haven’t had a decent shower in I don’t know how long.  Not the makings of a romantic travel situation for you and your partner.

Just like any other time in your life, couples that travel need to make the time to keep the relationship sizzling.  Backpacking is no exception. You can get so caught up in treks, seeing sights and partying, that you can loose sight of each other and simply turn into traveling buddies.  Well, here are some things you can do in South East Asia to chill out and bring a little romance back into your backpacking adeventure.

The romantic setting of Ubud brings back all romance to travels

1. Go for a massage and floral bath in Ubud, Bali – What better location than the centre of Bali surrounded by rice terraces, volcanoes, lush jungle and a feeling of what Bali must have felt like decades ago to take time for romance in your travels.  To the soft sound of traditional Balinese Music,  you can have your aching muscles worked on as you relax side by side.  It doesn’t end there. After you have completely relaxed, walk into the next room where a floral bath awaits.  When was the last time you had a bath during your travels in Asia?  You milk it for all its worth and sit in that tub until your skin prunes.  But you don’t care, you are rejuvenated, mellow and smelling a whole lot better.  Maybe a trip to the market is in order to spice up your travel clothes.  Top off the night with some wine and cheese at the Delicat restaurant.

A Pool in Paridise Makes Everyone Happy

A fine hotel will bring back any romance

2. Splurge on a hotel. We love Wotif.com to find an executive suite in Kuala Lumpur (or any big city for that matter).  We did this after months on the road, and it was heaven.  It cut into our budget a bit, but it was worth it.  For under $100 you can stay in a deluxe hotel at an extremely discounted rate.  We loved sitting in our white robes on our queen size bed so much that we went back to the Internet and booked another night.  It was worth every minute and we were ready to face the hassles of travel fresh and relaxed.  Yes, there was a pool too, but as many of you travelers know, a clean, comfortable and decadent bed is a luxury for any travel couple and we didn’t leave it for 2 days.

A Cruise Through Ha Long Bay to Bring Back Romance

3. Take a cruise on Ha Long Bay- Bring along some Vang Dalat, Vietnams cheap red wine and cruise through Vietnams most spectacular destination, the magnificent Ha Long Bay.  Lay on the top deck and watch the unique landscape pass you by.  You are surrounded by giant khart; thousands of limestone islands burst out of the South China Sea. The sky is blue and the breeze is cool and clam. You are fed a gourmet meal by an excellent cruise staff and will enjoy an evening under the stars in the most romantic place on earth.

Nha Trang Mud Baths to rekindle the Romance

4.Mud Baths of Nha Trang – So you have been fighting the touts of Vietnam for days, the pollution is taking its toll on your skin and that cracked heel that you developed just won’t go away.  You need a rest.  Just outside of Nha Trang there is a romantic little getaway, the theraputic mud baths.  Cover yourself in this cool goo and bake away your worries in the sun.  After rinsing off under the shower, pop into a hot tub and clear your mind.  The serenity and peace can lift your spirits back up to face the rigors of travel in Vietnam.  But wait, you can’t leave yet, you need to stretch this out for as long as possible.  Never fear, there is a warm pool that you can swim in and relax by.  Stay all day chatting with each other with no fear of being interrupted to buy a book or some flowers.  Just watch how you start to reconnect with each other and have those romantic feelings come surging back.

5. Meditate in Chang Mai – You can book a private 2 to 5 meditation course in Thailand’s Northern city of Chang Mai.  What better way to reconnect than to meditate together.  We had a private session where we learned how to meditate to music, did a laughing meditation and eventually worked our way into a full meditative silence.  Our teacher cooked us traditional vegetarian dishes, and we ended each day with learning some Tai Chi.  With both of us centered and relaxed, we could easily get through our travels in a more Zen Like state.  It is a wonderful thing to do together, you will both be feeling refreshed and optimistic at the same time.

Splurge on a nice meal for travel romance

Other Travel Romance Ideas

• Go on a dinner cruise-you are in a land that has water everywhere.  Splurge on a romantic night out feasting on the water.  Almost all destinations offer dinner cruises and nothing brings two people together more that fresh air, good food and gorgeous scenery.
• Take a traditional cooking course.  These are everywhere and can be a lot of fun. Fun is important in any relationship.
• Massage, Massage everywhere.  The thing that I love about South East Asia are the massages everywhere.  You can get a cheap traditional massage that does wonders for the backpackers body.  On the beach in Thailand, On the Beach in Vietnam,  In Lao, Indonesia.  In Cambodia, get the best massage at one the healing hands massage clinics where highly trained blind masseurs take care of every joint. In Malaysia, try something different and get a traditional reflexology foot massage. It can be painful, but they will fix you right up.
• Take the time to just be.  Too often we run around catching busses, seeing attractions, jumping on a trek and ticking things off of our list, that we don’t stop to just relax for a few days and do nothing. It is important to take the time to watch the sun go down and walk on  the beach with no plans for rushing off any time soon. Just Be.

Relaxing will Help you reconnect